Here is my first ever memoir. I wrote this memoir about my first experience in the hospital and my first impressioin. This was a life changing expeirience for me and that is why I choose to write about it. The lesson in this memoir is that finding the positive in every moment can influence your insight on this moment. Wether it is a horrible moment that effects your life or something that isn’t that bad but still effects you. Finding the good helps coping with really bad parts in your life.

Hope you enjoy

LOSING MYSELF

Have you ever felt like you have no control over your body? Like every movement takes a lot of concentration and even when you try you end up doing things you can’t control it. The first time it happened to me, was a very normal day but that changed quickly. 

It was my mom’s birthday and we decided to go to the park because it was a beautiful day. I went over to the monkey bars. We had only been at the park for ten minutes when I thought of doing something else but as soon as my feet touched the ground I felt a chill go up my back. I instantly started to panic. Running towards my mom was like running with ten thousand weights attached to my leg. Every movement felt like running a marathon. 

As soon as words came out of my mouth as I started to explain to my mom what happened, she asked me to take a deep breath and slowly repeat what happened. “I was just on the monkey bars and now I feel like I can’t feel my legs anymore. Every movement is like running a ten mile run. And now I am really really scared that my leg is going to fall off,” I said. “Your leg won’t fall off but I think we have to go home. And if it is still bad in the morning we have to go to the hospital,” she responded. 

I hated hearing the word “hospital”. It makes me instantly get anxious and start rethinking where I could have gone wrong but the only thing that came to mind was not having such annoying problems but I couldn’t change that. 

Back at my house, I couldn’t go anywhere, but having your sibling help you with everything wasn’t that bad. On our way home from the park we stopped by a friend’s house and they gave me crutches which I was surprisingly excited about because I have never had crutches before. 

Anyway, by the time the morning came around, the 4 out of ten in my leg became an 8. So as you can guess, off to the hospital I went. It was raining as my dad drove me to the hospital.. of course! 

The hospital was scary. It was really tall so it felt like it was staring down on me as if to say “you have problems so you will be here for the rest of your life”. I couldn’t help but imagine me in my eighties still in the hospital and that sent a spider crawl feeling up my back. 

Although I knew that this wasn’t such a big deal, I kept hearing voices in my head saying things like “maybe she had a stroke,” or “maybe she will lose feeling for the rest of her life,” and none of those made me feel better. 

My dad helped me out of the car then I very slowly limped my way to the emergency entrance. I have never felt more overwhelmed in my whole entire life. The air smelt of barf and medicine. In the distance I could hear babies crying. There were a dozen chairs in the corner. Up ahead was a person behind plexiglass and a short hallway in the back that led to a weird looking room. There were child-ish drawings on the walls but even with all the cool things, it was too empty and it felt kind of strange. 

My dad shoved me towards the lady behind the desk. The lady said, “hello what is the emergency today?” My dad responded with a very short response, “My daughter has lost feeling in her leg. It started yesterday.” Because of COVID she had to ask some safety questions. 

When she was done she sent us to the strange room in the back which weirdly looked like a bathroom. There was a sink and a mirror. But there were tubes in the back of the room that were contracted to a huge bag. There were two ladies in the room. There were both wearing gowns and one was on a computer and the other was holding the bag. She put the bag on my arm and it instantly started to squeeze my arm making me feel like a deflated balloon. The nice lady said that this was a blood test and that it was only to check my blood flow. They sent me and my dad into a hospital room.

The next two hours went by so fast. There were two people who kept making me do these tests for how I can walk, and I failed all of the tests. Then this lady walked in and said she was going to give me an IV. I thought this sounded cool until they shoved a tube into my vein. I threw up because I get nauseous very easily. I went to get an MRI so at least I got to watch Despicable Me. The MRI was 2 hours of laying in the exact same position. Way too long to go without any movement at all. 

It felt like ten hours had passed but my dad said it was only five. I had to take 4 tests, 1 very long MRI, an IV stuck up my arm (which by the way, was still in my arm). This nurse walked in and told me they had to do another test, and I made a very funny joke to make me feel better. Finally they asked if I wanted anything to eat. I got to order a chocolate chip muffin, a bowl of fruit loops and apple juice (which I don’t actually like and makes me wonder why I ordered it). The froot loops tasted amazing since I don’t get to have sugary cereal a lot. The muffin tasted like whole wheat bread with chocolate chips inside of it. Overall, I hate hospital food. At least I got to eat things with sugar in them is what I thought was what my dad was trying to do to help me cope with the fact that I was in a hospital

Throughout the 6 hours I was at the hospital, I threw-up about 12 times. My mom finally came at around hour number 7, so that my dad could rest a bit. 

After 8 hours of pure torture, I finally was sent home. I never felt so happy to see my couch. All I could remember from the rest of the night was flopping on the couch. My family having dinner and then my dad carrying me to bed. 

In the morning, I thought of this whole experience but then it just dawned on me that I have a coping method…. I like to think of the positive in every moment. Whether it is thinking of my sister finally helping me with everything, or making the nurse laugh. The good things help you get through the tough moments. So after all that I went through these past two day it wouldn’t be such a horrible thing if I had to go to the hospital again. As long as I get sugary cereal, I am fine!

I hope you liked this memoir.

Can you relate to this moment? What was your first impression of the hospital? When have you ever thought of the positive in a bad moment?

In this coronavirus time I haven’t been doing much, but I’m doing enough to keep me stimulated.

I like to roller blade and go on my trampoline. I love doing tricks like flips, fronthand springs, handstands, cartwheels and so much more. I also like to play with my sister in our backyard. During the day from 8:45am to 3:45pm My and my sister have online school. We have a whole schedule. We have math class, language arts, french, hebrew, gym, art, music, judaics and we even have some games and activities. We have lunch breaks in the middle of the day. Me and my sister and my parents like to bike, walk, or rollerblade to a very big parking lot were my and my sister let out all of our energy. We act like we are insane. Then we go back to my house take a snack and heed up to our rooms and we continue our day of learning. Most days the wifi gives up on me and everything is so slow. If I see tat low wifi sign again I will go crazy.  am reading an amazing book right now called “The Land of Stories” by Chris Colfer. I don’t think I have ever loved a book more than this book. When I am not in school and I am not outside.. I am on my bed reading this book. If the weather was better maybe I would like this time more but so far my dream is not coming true. It was hard for my sister to realise she liked having her birthday in quarantine, but in the end she had a blast. We had a unicorn pinata and a mint-chocolate chip ice cream cake.

Are you and your siblings are getting along as well as me and my sister are?

Do you do any other activities in this time that I didn’t share?

Do you have online school?

Did your b-day this year happen in quarantine?

Thank you for reading my blog post.